Ethics, PUA Theory, Social Circle - Written by Entropy on Wednesday, April 8, 2009 14:29 - 5 Comments

Sex in the Workplace?

This is a follow up to Sunday’s Conversation Demolition. A reader had a great question about gaming girls at work and how having a reputation as a player can affect your career:

Does developing a “reputation” in the office seem to hurt your ability to rise in the company? PU stuff all aside. I would think maybe, especially in this day and age where women have more power in the workplace. if they are showing disdain on the surface, even if they really want your penis, that could still hurt you. But maybe not.

To be honest, I’ve never held a stable 9-5 office job for more than six weeks, so I couldn’t really answer it, but some other readers were able to offer good points.

It’s specific to the industry in which you work. In the financial services world (or what still exists of it), there are very few women in management and it’s a very alpha-centric social order, so fucking one or multiple female assistants or associates is no big deal and probably helps your office status. In other worlds, building a reputation as the office slut will not be a good thing for your career path at all.

In general though, and to quote my old Italian professor and life mentor, don’t shit where you eat. While it can be hot to fuck one of your co-workers on your work desk, and you can certainly get away with it, you’re creating a ton of potential for screwing up your career if you don’t navigate the situation well. 1,000 times more true if one of you in any way reports to the other one.

If you’re serious about your career (and you don’t work in an atmosphere where fucking co-workers is encouraged as it is in banking), dip into that pool at your own peril. There are plenty of other ways to meet hot women.

And another good point:

Keep in mind that if anything goes wrong and she uses the dreaded words “sexual harassment” you are in for a world of trouble. Not worth the risk IMO.

But I suppose a fact of note is that the hero in the demolition is from Europe and Europeans tend to be much more lax about sex in general than Americans, so I asked the man himself, and this is what he had to say:

I have been sleeping and fooling around with girls on various jobs, and it has never hurt my carreer.

What is very important though, at least in my opinion and also for most of the girls, is that you are discrete and keep it on the down low. Not only shouldn’t you want to be seen as a player that uses all the girls, she doesn’t want everybody to know either. This is also something that you can use to build attraction and sexual tension, for instance by mentioning how naughty it is to sleep with a co-worker. Furthermore, most bosses don’t appreciate office romances, simply because it’s distracting and thus may influence performance. So if your boss notices that you’re screwing all the girls in the office he won’t be happy about it, especially not if he isn’t getting any of them.

My advice would be to keep it discrete, and try to make sure nobody finds out.

And there ya have it. Use your judgment and discretion wisely. Or as my dad used to tell me, “Son, don’t dip your pen in company ink.” But luckily I’m in an industry that’s pretty accepting about those things. ;)

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Apr 8, 2009 18:37

“an atmosphere where fucking co-workers is encouraged as it is in banking”

I have never heard of this? Can someone elaborate on this.

Apr 8, 2009 18:59

…. You’re dipping in the company ink? I think you’ve heard enough gay jokes to see where this ones going

Apr 8, 2009 19:41

@Anonymous: I don’t know for sure, but I do have a good friend who works for a major Fortune 500 company who said upper management actually ENCOURAGES people to hook up within the company.

Maybe it helps company loyalty or something.

As for the banking thing, I could see it being more of a machismo thing.

Apr 13, 2009 16:51

I am a hairstylist and I have to say that I PU women in my workplace all the time. It has never hurt my job but I also understand that not everyone has that luxury. Look though 50 years ago I might have said that it is unacceptable but its the 21st century those rules dont count anymore I would say have fun.

Jul 7, 2009 12:56

Personally, I’ve never dipped the pen in the company ink, but I have worked in places where it has happened. There was an incident in which the VP was dating the payroll clerk. The VP was soon bought out of the company and the payroll clerk was fired.

It seems that the VP’s paychecks weren’t the only fat thing she was handling…

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