The Personalizing Pickup series is a series of articles that focus on the fact that not all guys are created equal and therefore, not all guys should learn to pick up women in the same way. Whereas other methods and philosophies prescribe a one-size-fits-all model — be it “canned” or “natural” — teaching men what they need to be good with women should be done on a case-by-case basis.

Put simply: No two men are the same, therefore no two guys should game the same.

It’s an exciting time in that the breadth of knowledge in the seduction community has reached the point where any guy can learn what he needs. The problem now is separating the necessary knowledge from the unnecessary knowledge, the relevant from the irrelevant. This will be different for every guy. In this series I set out to create a model in which for guys to learn exactly what THEY need, nothing less, nothing more.

I. What Do You Want?
II. Learning Styles and Inner Game
III. Natural Advantages/Disadvantages
IV. Skills and Talents
V. Current Sticking Points and Issues

As Napoleon Dynamite once famously said, “Chicks like guys with skills.” Whether that’s bo staff skills or some other sort of skill, well, that’s another post.

But this is a pretty simple concept that I feel like goes over the head of most guys coming into the community. Just like the last post in the series focused on playing to your natural advantages (be them physical, social or whatever), you should also play towards your best skills.

For instance, if you’re an excellent conversationalist, you shouldn’t go to really loud clubs. Why? Because it’s hard to carry on a really great conversation. Instead, you should focus on day game, quieter lounges and social events.

If you’re really good at escalating and getting a girl turned on, then you WOULD want to focus on loud clubs, because those are the venues that facilitate those skills the best.

I often see guys reluctant to use their talents or connections to help themselves out. For instance, if you’re a guitarist in a band, why on earth wouldn’t you sarge at your gigs? My god, it’d make everything 10 times easier. That’s a talent and skill you can put to your use. I see this a lot with guys who are rich, but they don’t want to drop money for bottle service or VIP treatment because they feel like its “cheating.” If you have the money and don’t mind spending it, why not do it? It’ll make things easier.

So ask yourself the following questions:
1) Which skills come naturally easy for you? Is it approaching? Conversation? Flirting and attraction?

For me conversation skills were always very easy for me. Once I got into a set for 2-3 minutes, I never had problems holding it. So I avoided the super loud and crazy clubs that facilitated that advantage.

2) What do you have going for you in your life that you can use to help you sarge?

For me, when I started, I was a fifth year senior in college. I was well connected in the party scene and had tons of friends on campus. So instead of hitting bars all the time to cold approach, I spent most of my first year in the community at college parties where I had a lot of social proof. Sure, this was “easier” than cold approach at bars, but I got results pretty fast and a year later when I did start going to bars and clubs, I was already that much better.