Sorry I’ve been absent this weekend. Lots of stuff going on in the EntropyPUA world. I’ll be filling you guys in on most of it in the coming week. But to hold you over, I’m going to answer a few of the emails I got this weekend while I was away in a quick mailbag. As always, if you have questions you want answered in a mailbag, either reply to this post here or email them to: entropy@practicalpickup.com.

Hi Entropy,

Thanks,
Lore

Going direct on a girl in mixed sets will have one of two reactions, and it’s completely based on your non-verbals and first impression to the group. The guys will either get very defensive and engage you or they’ll back down and completely leave you alone. Unfortunately, a lot of this has to do with whether a) they want the girl or not and b) whether they think they could kick your ass if they had to or not.

I avoid the super-direct stuff for mixed sets. Mixed sets, I find engaging the guys first and then talking to the girls works the best. When you engage the girls first, the guys usually put their guard up and try to AMOG your or whatever (I hate that term). Indirect openers work well for mixed sets.

Hey Mark, I think the subjects says it all. I’ve been meeting girls that somehow hit on me and they are doable but their personallity is… how can I say it…. shallow?, not interesting, etc. Some of them are so dumb that I don’t want to interact too much with them but I’d like to fuck them, or at least try to. But How can I build comfort with somebody that I’m not really interested emotionally? Forget the moral part of the subject, please!

Unfortunately, a lot of women will fall into this category. I literally had a girl answer the question, “What’s your biggest passion in life? What do you love to do more than anything?” with, “Watch reality television.” She was serious too. To answer your question, just get her to talk about herself a lot. Even if you’re not interested, get her to go on and on about herself. Everyone’s favorite conversation topic is themselves, and the more you get her to talk about it, the more she’ll feel connected to you.

I have a question/problem about monogamy and having sex whenever and however I want. Maybe I’m looking at this the wrong way, but here’s how I see it. Whenever I’m dating more girl at a time, and one of them doesn’t want to have sex at some particular point in time, or doesn’t want to do whatever kinky thing I want right then, I’m totally fine with it. My attitude is like, “it’s not her responsibility to make me happy, my fate is in my hands, I can go fuck some other girl”, and it’s not like I’m mad at the girl at all. I still have totally positive emotions towards her.

It’s like I automatically become needy when I’m in a monogamous relationship.  Is there a way out of this trap, without simply becoming a committed polyamorist and refusing to enter a monogamous relationship?

This is a form of neediness in your relationships. For whatever reason, you’re attaching a lot of validation to how often your partner has sex with you. For whatever reason, you’re connecting “her wanting to have sex with me,” with “she loves me,” and this only becomes a big deal when you’re in a serious relationship.

I feel like in every long-term relationship there’s always one person who wants sex more than the other and this dynamic comes up a lot, where one person always feels like they have to bother the other one for sex and the other gets turned off by it. This may sound stupid, but do you still look at porn when you’re in a relationship? You may try that to relieve your excess sexual desire and not put pressure on your partner. As for not seeking the validation from her, that’s simply something you have to overcome by understanding she loves you despite whether she’s horny or not.