First off, love the blog. It’s a great resource.

Thanks in advance,
Xander

Yes, that’s 90+% on first dates. Unless you’re older (35 and up), I’d say you should be closing consistently at this rate. If you’re not, it means you’re not escalating quickly enough.

As for follow-up, it changes things in a couple ways. It creates more of a “relationship” frame versus a “fun hookup” frame. So she’s going to naturally want to take things more romantically, be more sensual and emotional about everything.

The biggest reason I tell guys to sleep with women on the first date is because once sex is out of the way, it gives everyone so much more leg-room as far as establishing the relationship moving forward. Expectations don’t get so built up. If a woman has sex with you, you KNOW she’s going to call back, whereas you can never be sure if you don’t.

If by chance you don’t hook up on the first date, I’ll contact her sooner than I would otherwise, as she’s not as invested in you yet. Typically I’ll always contact a woman after the first date with a text or something, and then schedule the next date after 3-5 days. If I don’t sleep with her, I may cut that down to 2-3 days.

Hey Entropy,

I just finished Man on Campus. It’s great. But I just recently transferred to a new school and will be coming in as a junior. How does this change the dynamic of my college game?

Nathan

Good question, and I can’t believe I didn’t address this in the course considering I was a transfer student in college.

When you transfer in, you have a big advantage and then a big disadvantage. The advantage is that you’re an upper classman, you have easier access to alcohol, probably have your own place, etc. So logistically you’re better off.

The disadvantage is that you don’t get the dorm experience, so you don’t have all of those insta-friends that underclassmen get when they first come in Freshman and/or sophomore year.

So I would just focus a lot more on meeting people through extra-curricular activities and classes. It may take a little more time, but considering your better logistical situation, it’ll pay off faster.

I’m also doing a bunch of interviews right now. One is supposed to be for a local news station, but the broad keeps flaking on me (women…).

But anyway, this week’s mailbag deals with more theoretical stuff of why you should escalate, social circle game, and limiting beliefs.

Hey Mark, I’ve been analyzing my game lately and I think that the only thing that I don’t do is pushing the interaction, your famous ABC! I get telephone numbers easily, but I think anyone can do that. I’ve made out few times and when I do it I see the girl again. I’ve never had a SNL or sex in the bathroom. Why is it so hard to see the girl again if you don’t have a physical interaction with her? What does she think that she wants to see you again? What does she think that she doesn’t want to see you again when yo don’t have a physical interaction with her? What’s going on in their minds? Why do I have to have the physical interaction ASAP? What is the problem with dating?

Thanks, Leo.

There’s nothing “Wrong” with dating or taking things slow. The more physical you get with a woman, the more invested they become in the interaction. For instance, if you talk to a woman for two hours one night and get her number she may think three days later, “Oh, he was a nice guy,” but not make any effort to see you again. But if you talk for two hours and passionately make out then she’s much more likely to remember you, be more emotionally invested in you, and backward rationalize reasons why she liked you and wants to see you again.

I recommend guys get physical as soon as possible because it increases their chances of seeing women again, decreases flakes, and gives them more flexibility in establishing expectations for the relationship.

Entropy,
I’m 20, but I feel like I’m 60. I feel like I’ve been wasting my life. Everytime I try and improve my discipline, skills, whatever, a little voice inside me goes “Damn you, John. Why didn’t you do this years ago?” I need to get over my regrets.

Thanks,
John

Yeah, you do. Dude, you’re so young, it’s ridiculous. Just remind yourself every time you think this to go ahead and do now because if you don’t, five years from now you’ll back and say, “Damnit John, why didn’t you do this when you were 20.” This way, you can prevent those thoughts from even occurring in the future.

Hey Entropy, I think you are right on with your Personalizing Pickup ideas. To follow up on the question from anonomous, for us lucky guys who have physical advantages, would you suggest different openers since we are coming in with high value as it is? Direct or indirect, maybe low-investment or compliment openers, or even low value openers like Braddock’s “I’m not sure what to say to you, but I had to meet you. I’m Braddock.”

How about with qualification? Should we avoid the large and harsher hoops like “What do you have going for you other than your looks?” and stick with small/medium hoops? Or should we assume rapport and go straight into comfort after the opener?

Thanks.
F

Yes, the more physical advantages you have, the more going direct will take care of literally all the attraction game you need. Also, much lower investment openers work really well, such as, “Hi, I’m F.” because most of the time when you approach girls figure you approach women a lot and want to be hit on by you.

As for qualifying, you don’t want to be harsh, but definitely get as deep as possible with your hoops to build more comfort. Again, the disadvantage of being good-looking is that women are going to be slower to trust you and think that you say this shit to every girl. You’re much more likely to come off as a “player” and often they have to feel like they earned your affection. This is why the more natural (passive) attraction you have, the less you need to build (active attraction).

Hey Entropy! Sad news Doc is done but I’m actually glad for him. Simple question: how do you handle getting a reputation with being with a lot of women. For a while I felt like my dick was on the black list but recently I have been cleaning up, but certainly girls have heard about me. Any ideas?

Best,
Adam

I wrote about this last year. I call it “Attraction by Osmosis.” It’s an interesting effect once you infiltrate a social circle and start sleeping with the girls in it.

What happens is they naturally become more attracted to you (this is what I called “attraction by osmosis”). But because of their increased attraction for you, they become more skeptical of you and will test your congruence a LOT. I think they also do this for social reasons because they don’t want their other friends to think they’re trying to steal their man or whatever.

But basically these girls will ACT really bitchy towards you, but if you remain unaffected and get one of them alone, usually sleeping with them is very easy.

Like most of my game my answer to this “common sense game.” But for it to be common sense you have understand one key thing–

Women do not want to be seen as sluts!

They don’t want to be seen as sluts by their friends, coworkers, the bartender, etc.

Knowing this, the common sense thing to do is to not escalate when her friends can see or hear you. But I’ll take it a step further and really break it down.

Verbal Escalation

Verbal escalation is basically anything you say to escalate the interaction. It can be qualification questions, comfort stories, compliments, games like strawberry fields, or directly talking about sex.

You can’t really talk about these things in front of a girl’s friends because she’s gonna know they’re listening to what she says and judging her.

But as soon as her friends can no longer hear what you’re saying you can start escalating verbally. Obviously it takes some calibration as far as what to say and when but that’s not something I can teach you in writing.

But it’s a safe bet that as soon as you’re out of earshot of her friends you can start qualifying her and build off of that into comfort and sexual topics.

Physical Escalation

Kissing, playing with her hair, hand on her thigh, etc.

You’re usually safe to do this stuff once her friends can no longer see you. No one watching = No one thinking she’s a slut.

I usually don’t kiss girls I have one night stands with until we’ve let the venue and are either walking down the street or in a taxi.

Pretty simple but I’m always surprised at the number of guys who try to make out with girls in front of her friends and then get pissed at her or themselves because they got turned down for the kiss.

Some women are very self conscious about their period and others really couldn’t give a shit.

The easiest way to have sex with a woman on her period is to not make a big deal about it. At some point in the night she’s going to let you know she’s on the rag. Your initial reaction is important here, most guys blow it right away by saying something along the lines of “eww, gross, etc.” That’s the wrong answer, odds are she’s already a little self conscious about her vag at the moment and you freaking out and saying “eww” certainly doesn’t give her an ego boost.

My reaction when a woman tells me “I’m on my period” is usually “It happens.” I’m not making a big deal about it and then I can go into a story about sex with girls on their period.

“I really don’t understand why people make such a big deal about it. Like seriously, it’s a natural thing, I lived with a girl I was dating for a while and what are we gonna do, not have sex for 1 week every month? That’s 12 weeks a year! Plus, I mean, it’s sort of a turn on.”

A couple of things going on in that story–
1. The meta-frame of the whole story is that having sex on your period is normal.
2. Periods are a natural human thing.
3. You’ve had sex with women on their period before and it obviously doesn’t bother you.
4. The not having sex for one week every month actually comes from a girl I was dating. And if you really think about it 12 weeks is 3 months which is 1/4 of a year… That’s a lot of sex you’re not having.
5. It’s a turn on. There’s just something about telling a woman her bleeding kitten turns you on…

The final thing you have to worry about is tampons. I’ve found they can be a really bad state break. You can’t fuck her while she has one in and her naked on your bed isn’t the best time or place for her to take it out. To get around this I wait till things are getting hot and heavy, back off to change the music, and tell her to go freshen up in the bathroom, they always take the hint. If you do this once it’s established you two are having sex that night it doesn’t interrupt the flow of anything but it takes some calibration to know once you’ve hit that “sex is gonna happen” point.